Pathetic Song?

'When you go out on a limb for God, often you'll look behind you and see the Devil taking a saw to the branch.'

We read this in a book by Nancy Goudie, one of the originators of New Generation Music, based near Bristol. I was reading the book for encouragement, because this is exactly what is happening to us right now. We are WAY out on a limb. And that limb is being sawn off as we speak.

I woke up all hot and panicky with a sore stomach and rapid pulse at 1.30 am last night. As I thought of the deep disappointments of the weekend, how I'd prayed earnestly for hours on Sunday asking for some sort of direct encouragement from God to reassure us, how our paltry savings, originally intended to repair our rotting front porch, are swiftly dwindling, my mind also started to race to all kinds of 'What Ifs?'

What if the pa system we hired doesn't turn up?
What if we can't borrow a laptop with Songpro on it?
What if all the local church leaders decide to withold their support for Life-Songs?
What if our best singer gets a cold?
What if the Youth musicians who are helping play *really* badly that night?
What if it all goes brilliantly, but we don't get any financial support for the next stage of the vision and the whole project dies?

I was lying there stuck in panic mode. Partly because of the few things which have not gone so well so far, but also BORROWING fears from the future, which, may never be realised. {g} But by then, the old physical signs of the panic attack were in full flood. I crept downstairs and turn on Christian radio. But it was boring old hymns. Sorry, but they just weren't inspiring to me in that moment. My eyes were too tired to read my Bible. So I just lay on the sofa with my cat purring almost inaudibly on my lap, pleading with God for some encouragement.

'You have to TRUST God for His promises,' I keep hearing and reading at the moment. It's not Faith if you only hope. Faith is active trust.

This morning, I'm thinking about this verse:

'Keep yourselves free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
"I will never leave you or forsake you." ' Hebrews 14: 5-6

Is God saying that to worry about money is not to be free from the love of it? Certainly I am not content with what we have. I wish we had more, if for nothing else, so that we could take on this project more wholeheartedly.

Jamie bounced out of bed this morning and announced that one of the songs we're going to be singing, Almighty God My Redeemer by Darlene Zschech 'is a prophetic song for us right now.' Huh? Jamie doesn't normally talk in those terms. I don't think I've EVER heard the word 'prophetic' come out of his mouth before. I thought I'd misheard and he was trying to say 'pathetic'! That's more like it. {vbg} But no, actually. I was right the first time.

So, I'm not to worry. We're to climb out further onto that limb, children clinging to our legs, to follow God's goal for us. And maybe, as in Nancy Goudie's case, after the Devil has finished sawing, the tree will fall and the branch will remain solid.

I DECIDE TO TRUST.

ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!